Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Hobbies or Nightmares

Sometimes it is hard to tell.
I love to try new things but I very seldom continue with the intense interest that is the hallmark of a new project or hobby. That high level of energy and time can just suck the life out of you and take over your whole world. And there are just too many things I want to do to invest all of me in a single, hobby black hole. Multiple black holes? Stop sniggering.
So, I love to spin and because I spin, I have great volumes of yarn. I wash the fleeces and spin, I buy rovings and spin, and I blend fibers and spin. I have a folder of beautiful shawl and sweater patterns. I am developing my own pattern for a leafy thing. I have books and tools and way more stuff than I can finish in a lifetime. I have a lathe that sits forlornly in the garage, covered with raw wool fleeces. Fleeces waiting to be washed, tools waiting to me used, yarn waiting to be useful, a garden waiting to be harvested. And what am I doing while all this is waiting- spinning? Well wouldn't that be nice.
Actually I have been obsessed with making a pair of socks to enter in a judged show in Oregon. The socks were too small for Eduard, so they will be for Max. A calculation error that made me quite annoyed. I lovingly spun a tiny, tiny thread to three ply for socks knit on size one needles. I have given myself a stiff neck, punctured my finger, and nearly gone blind. Did I mention this was a black wool? Yes, spinning and knitting black is very hard to see. I can only do it during the daylight hours. And there were cables. Just slap me. Big chunks of days have been spent on these socks- from spinning to knitting to filling out forms and documenting- so that I can give them to a 5 year old.
I want you to know that I actually love knitting socks, but not all socks are created equal. I did not love these socks. Now they are done and I am writing up the forms for the entry. I look at the socks and they don't look so wonderful or special. They don't seem like award winning socks, high quality yarn, or such a lovely design. They are well executed and sized for Max, but I am disappointed. They are not for Eduard. They didn't use up lots of yarn and fleece. They are not so wonderful that I can look at my waiting tools and other hobbies and justify the time spent.
This has been a nightmare pair and I need a break for a bit. I have some large yarn for making a felted pumpkin bag on big needles. I have some lovely hand spun lace weight for a beaded shawl. I have three bags of soil amendment and a waiting garden. I have a wooly room in a state of chaos and the house is in serious need of cleaning. I have 5 looms waiting for reconstuctive surgery. And, I am having dinner guests tomorrow.
I need to push my hobbies aside and struggle out of the gravitational pull so that I can get my house in order. Last night I dreamed I was walking through a park in Solvang with Eduard and I had forgotten to get dressed in the morning. I was strolling through town naked with my drop spindle, spinning. Usually, when you get the "naked in public" dream you feel embarrassed about your naked body. Not me. I was annoyed that I had forgotten my clothes, but talked to people about the spinning anyway.
So, today is a new day, the socks are off the sticks, and I am going to start cleaning the house. Laundry, kitchen, garden, bathrooms, living room. I am going to fight the urge to bring out the wheel, start another project, lounge in the wooly room stroking my stash. Really. I promise.
Edited update- Blue Ribbon, Max has the socks now.

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